


tear

by forev



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Depression, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Self-Harm, Self-Worth Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-02
Updated: 2016-03-02
Packaged: 2018-05-24 10:19:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6150377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forev/pseuds/forev
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>hinata shouyou knows he isn’t good enough.</p>
            </blockquote>





	tear

**Author's Note:**

> this is a vent fic. please do not read if you are triggered easily.

hinata shouyou knows he isn’t good enough. he’s terrible at volleyball, it’s obvious the only reason he’s a regular is because of kageyama. he thinks about it all to often. he clenches his fists, letting his fingernails dig into his palms. he’ll never be good enough. he tires so  _ fucking  _ hard, so hard. he’s missed days worth of sleep so that he could stay up and practice. he can’t get any better. he’ll never never get any better…

he’s curled up in the middle of his bed, knees tucked up to his chest. the sheets next to him are wet from his tears. god, why couldn’t he be good at one thing! he just wants to be good, he doesn’t want to let anyone down! a ragged sob rips from his throat, and he rubs at his eyes with the heels of his hands. he reaches for his drawer and pulls it open. maybe he could just forget everything.. just for a second. 

he lets the razor blade rest in his palm, barely feeling it’s weight. he sits up, surveying his soft, scar littered thighs. he presses down, and his mind is blissfully white for a second. he wants to scream, so he does. his family isn’t home anyways. he opens his mouth and screams as loud as he can. 

he swipes his hand across his face, brushing away stray tears. another swipe of the razor, tearing his milky skin into two. it feels so good not to think about how worthless he is. 

 

they have a match with nekoma the next day, but hinata is tired. he’s so so tired. 

but no one seems to notice… no one… notices. it makes hinata feel worse. 

after the game, hinata stays in the locker room, rocking back and forth as tears cascade down his cheeks. they lost. it’s all his fault. he couldn’t get around the blockers. god, why do they even keep him on the team!

he’s alone in the room for all of five minutes before he hears the soft pads of footsteps approaching him. 

“shouyou?” a soft voice says. 

hinata doesn’t answer. he’s sitting on the floor of nekoma’s locker room, wearing only his boxers. he must be a sight to see. 

“ _ shouyou _ ,” kenma says again, “are you alright?”

hinata lifts his head, coming face to face with a pair of glittering golden eyes. 

kenma brushes his hand along hinata’s thigh, “i’m so sorry.” 

hinata surges forwards, wrapping his arms around the older boy and weeping into his shoulder. 

“it’s okay, shouyou. it’s all going to be okay.” 

hinata tries to believe him. 


End file.
